Thankful for a Legacy of Faith

This weekend I get to help celebrate the 50th anniversary of my grandparents. I am so blessed and thankful that both sets of my grand parents have been together for 50 or more years! It is very encouraging to see them living and sharing in my life, and the lives of others in my family, the importance of marriage and oneness held together by the Lord. 

I had asked each of them to let me know what the "secret" was to staying together for 50+ years. Here are some of the nuggets of wisdom that I am able to now store away and use in my own marriage.

• Keep your priorities: God first, spouse second and children third
• A family that prays and worships together, stays together
• Train your children 
• In all things give thanks
• Listen before you speak
• Have a short memory :)

 

"As you know, a marriage is between a man and a woman and God until death do us part.  It is through the love and sacrifice of marriage that we understand that God is love and to be happy we have to constantly struggle to forget ourselves and love God and our spouse more.  Patience, faith,  humor and forgiveness play a  large part in marriage  but if we put God and our spouse first, there is no question that you will be together “until death do us part.”

"During labor there is a lot of pain but once the baby is born, the pain is quickly forgotten.  There have been many struggles, pain and sorrow but after 50 years of marriage you only remember the love."

 

Aren't grandparents amazing! 

"My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you, turning your ear to wisdom

and applying your heart to understanding—indeed, if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding." Proverbs 2:1-6

Marriage is a difficult thing; we make a vow to another person to love and cherish them to death do us part but there is a lot of life in-between in most cases. So much of reality TV is spent on marriage and family, why? Because it is full of drama, and changes every day. The days are not always love filled, gushy moments where everything is wonderful, sometimes daily life and our own nature get the better hand. My husband and I are going on 4 years of marriage this September and we both agree it was one of the best decisions we have made, it also happens to be one of the most life changing.
Here are some of my first "shockers" as a young married couple.

Your needs are not always first or always taken care of: This especially gets emphasized when you become parents. It can lead to a bitterness of the soul if it is not properly discussed between the couple to figure out how to prioritize in order to take the best care of each other. I try and remind myself of this verse. "And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus" Philippians 4:19 A perfect God has promised to meet my need, what reason do I have to complain.

Money or lack of can be extremely wearing: Thankfully my husband and I have been debt free since we were married, praise the Lord! However that doesn't mean we have never come across times of leanness or loss of an asset. Things get tight but the Lord always manages to show Himself mighty and provide in ways unexpected.

Sometimes you just get on each others nerves:  It could be because you are opposites or even just regular male/female differences but it has happened to everyone that has been married; of that I am certain! As long as you can laugh about it afterwards when you realize how silly you both can be at times.

Your spouse will change: Be prepared, for changes. Physically we change, spiritually we grow stronger (hopefully), mentally we become more alike but all of this strangely draws us closer together. It must be the "becoming one flesh" process. In all I have enjoyed this unexpected growing together. "and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one flesh." Mark 10:8

You will share everything:
Again this is even more pronounced when you are a parent too. From food to personal space nothing is just yours anymore. I borrow his sweatshirts, he eats my protein bars. It helps when are telling our children that everything belongs to the Lord so we should treat things well and be generous/share.  This just happens to be harder for me as I didn't have siblings till I was 16 :)

Marriage is beautiful, complex, surprising, challenging, joyous, painful, satisfying and everything in-between! I cannot imagine how much more we will learn about each other and grow closer together in the next 46 years, Lord willing, on our 50th anniversary.